2005-12-28
Like a door to door salesman knows the pains of bell-ringing
Hi folks. NoGoodDaddy here. I was only asked to do this like 7 years ago�
I had a 2nd interview for a job last night. Needless to say, whenever your interview ends with �I guess I wasn�t very clear when I said that if this was a commissioned sales position I would not be interested and that you should not waste a slot in the 2nd round of interviews on me�
Last week, I get one of those vague calls from a woman seeing if I could come for an interview. They like my PM skills and have an opening for a manager/project manager position. It sounded fishy as hell, but I need to keep my interview muscles toned up, so I agreed to go.
I nailed the conversation on Monday. I had all the right answers and my skills matched up with what the guy said he wanted�except�he was being very vague about the job. This was with a financial firm and it had �Go sit in someone�s house and scare them into giving you all their money� written all over it. I asked �What exactly do you have in mind or are you just assembling people who may be fits for open positions?� He was vague and told me to come back for a meeting last night with some of the other managers and�candidates�
WHOOP WHOOP
That�s the Cattle Call alarm going off in my head. I stopped him again and said �If this is a commissioned sales job where you�re going to expect me to pay for my own training and then go sit in peoples� homes and sell them a savings and insurance package they can�t afford, I am not at all interested. I want to be upfront about it because I don�t want to waste your or my time going any further. I�ve been to those things before and am not at all interested�
He assured me it was not.
So, I had nothing else to do last night�
Guess who was right? DING�If you chose me, you are CORRECT. It was one of these:
Here�s John and Mary. They owe $100000 against a house valued at $150000. They have $20000 in credit card debt. We get them to refinance and then plow the difference between their combined mortgage and card payments back into the principle of the loan and a life insurance policy. We also get them to invest more money and look. PRESTO! They�re rich!
Back in 1998 or 9, within a year of buying our first house, an old friend of JewelrySlut�s called. Her husband was getting into the financial planning business and wanted to know if he and his training guy could come do their pitch on us. She agreed. At this time, we were broke. We were making, combined, what I make now and were mortgaged to the hilt. We had no spare income that didn�t say �VISA� on it. They come to the house, run the numbers and I�m telling them all along �This is to train Dorkwad. Do not come here and push anything on us. We are here to help him�. They come back and show us our plan. And shove it at us. Essentially, we needed to spend more than we made to get on their savings plan. Column A had our income. Column B had expenses (including the new savings plan). B was a larger number than A. I remarked how ridiculous this was and was berated over not making enough money. At that point, I stood up, told them that I was disgusted that they�d come to our house and pull this shit during an alleged training session and told them to leave my house and to never call us again.
I described this to the guy this past Monday when I told him how un-interested I was in that as a job.
So, last night was a re-hashing of that conversation. The woman next to me was as disgusted as I was. She started baiting the presenter with questions like �If I�m on your plan and my kids get sick and I need access to MY money am I allowed to spend it?� The woman answered that you would need to sit with your planner to discuss whether or not this fit with your plan or not. I almost cracked up.
Then they do the speech about who their target market is. They say it�s made up of 2 generations. Can anyone name them? Right. Baby Boomers are one. Some idiot in the back of the room yells out �the military� as the second. I nearly died. Yes sir. The military. Gen X? Nope�the military.
So, at the end, I went to the guy and told him again that I was sorry to have wasted a spot that could otherwise have been used for someone who could have been interested in the job and that I apologized if I was vague. He said that he must have misunderstood me. Then I realized the problem. I was speaking the same language that I speak when I tell Shmuppie things.
Like:
Honey let�s have lunch.
I just did have a snack. Do you want to see my flupe?
??Wha??
We move on. I have enough job irons in the fire right now to keep me busy. I need to wait until after New Year�s to really start pushing for them. I think I can manage to be employed past March in one capacity or another. Hopefully at a nice raise too. I know I�m woefully underpaid right now, but trade that for the whole 8 second commute thing. But, I should be making almost $20G�s than I do now.
But, back to the interview�I understand the debt problem going on, but I also don�t think that scaring the shit out of people is a way to solve it. These plans to get you debt free in 5 years don�t work. They don�t allow for life to get in the way. Like �Oh shit�I just crashed my car into a deer whiled the washing machine burst into flames�. All they want you to do id buy life insurance and invest back into them. Must be nice if you can see the future and know that you�ll never have a financial crisis or any illnesses� Ugh�I�m ranting now. I should stop before I stroke out. Heck, I�m just happy to finally have a positive net worth. 3 cheers for inflated real estate prices in New Jersey!
I wish I had more to say. I can see ClipChick now��Why did I let this idiot guest post? I thought he�d be funny. ShitDamn.�
I should have just posted a list of the latest Shmuppieisms but, honestly, I can�t remember any. She�s had the 2 of us crying lately with the things she says. She makes no sense and has an amazing ability to mix verb tenses. I should make a list and post it here. Folks at my site already don�t expect anything from me.
clipchick at 3:00 p.m.
All thoughts, ideas, and musings are � Clipchick. Please don't snipe my stuff!
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